Along the years, Thanksgiving in my family has been the same ever since I could remember, but this year I've hit something strange/off balance. A holiday where we enjoy and gave thanks for the most simple pleasures in life- family, friends, our jobs, our home, and many other things. I've ran into this odd feeling and of course, like always, I've decided to share it. Maybe you've had this feeling, or perhaps not, but maybe you'll grasp onto some sort of life lesson or be reintroduced.
If you didn't know, I've grown up as an only child, yet in my life I've always been surrounded by many people- aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, my godmother/godfather, my parents and many others. It's an odd life us only children live: no competition, no comparisons, no need for approval, infinite freedom of all the burdens society has created- "survival of the fittest." (all I'm presenting has meaning of course). Well, if you were to look at a generic reading of my life (minus the complexities it attains), you would say my life is the ideal modern life. I wouldn't say my parents are the poorest, and definitely not the richest, but aside the complicated things life has thrown at them, they are the most open minded, non-judgmental, neutral people I know on the face of the earth and I'm internally grateful for the love and inspiration they've always given me. This is where the complicated side comes.
Being an only child is one thing; being a single, only child of the parents I have, has not only made me feel internally alone for twenty years, it's created this being of who I am and what I will become in the future.
We create this idea, that being alone in this world is a bad thing, but in my reality to be alone is an amazing thing; it blocks out what the world can taint who we are, the neutralizers. The greatest people we know probably felt as alone in society: Beethoven, Hester Prynne, or Abraham Lincoln (no I may not be crazy but you get the idea.)
Its all made sense. The past twenty years, feeling alone, bubbled up, hasn't shielded me in a bad way, if not, it's only preserved the goodness of the worse that's yet to come.
Sometimes in a world full of family, friends and love, at the end of the day you're left standing alone. Personally, being alone has never really bothered me and has allowed me to channel deeper with myself. I know, maybe this sounds more of a sad blog, or depressing, but it's not really (which is odd coming from an extrovert person who's very strong & independent). Just before I started writing this, I started to think about everything- family, friends, past relationships, and I started to cry.... but I laughed. It wasn't that aching pain you feel in your chest when you begin to cry, but it was this sweet sadness. I now have this grown up perspective. You can judge me that I'm still young and I've been judged this many times, but I'm separate from the masses; it's just that feeling I get everyday.
This Thanksgiving I want you to remember this when you're having dinner with your family, friends, or even if you're alone: be thankful for the life we all live today, the air we breathe, our legs to walk into random adventures, our eyes to see the world... because there's someone out there who cannot see, or hear, or walk.
There's this saying the Brit's say: "Every cloud has a silver lining." Which means, there's always good in the bad things we experience. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right?
What am I thankful for?
My parents: without them, I wouldn't be the most open minded, patient person I've grown to be. They've taught me to not judge people, no matter who, what they are.
2 Best Friends (Bianca & Grace): If I ever had sisters, I would imagine they both be the sisters I've always wanted to grow up with.
Life in general: I've had moments in my life where I've just been grateful enough to breathe.
Happy Thanksgiving loves.
Kristin Lynn
Remember, being or feeling alone isn't a bad thing, it's an independent thing.
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